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The Book of EPHESIANS
James J. Barker
Lesson 20
THE CHRISTIAN HOME
INTRODUCTION
- The family is now under full-scale
attack. When I was a boy the vast
majority of families in America had a dad and a mom and several
children.
- Those days are long
gone. Now it is usually a mom with
children and no husband, or a husband and wife with no kids or maybe just one,
or maybe it is too homosexuals with adopted children.
- So far citizens in 31 states
(including liberal states like California) have voted for keeping traditional
marriage a man and a woman (Eph. 5:33).
- But nevertheless, the
sodomites and their liberal allies are still pushing hard to redefine the
family.
- The sodomites and their
liberal allies tried to pass a so-called gay marriage law the other day up in
Albany, but thank God they failed.
In fact, the vote wasn t even close.
- That this sort of
foolishness has become commonplace here in America indicates how far this
country has drifted from its Biblical mooring.
- We need to get back to what
the Bible teaches about the home.
- The Bible teaches that
marriage is analogous to that of Christ and His church.
- Spurgeon said: When home is
ruled according to God s Word, angels might be asked to stay with us, and they
would not find themselves out of their element.
I.
WIVES ARE TO BE SUBMISSIVE
(5:21, 22; cf. COL. 3:18).
- I would like to preface my
remarks by stating that all Christians should have a meek, submissive spirit
(Eph. 5:21).
- The husband is to be the
head of the home (5:22-24).
- Subjection does not imply
inferiority. Women are not inferior to men; just as Christ is inferior to God
the Father (I Cor. 11:3).
- God is a God of order (cf. I
Cor. 11:3).
- This is not a very popular
subject these days, but nevertheless the Bible is clear wives are to be
submissive to their husbands (Eph. 5:22).
- God s plan goes back to
creation (Gen. 3:16; cf. I Cor. 11:8, 9; I Tim.
2:9-14).
- God has a plan, an
order. And when this plan is
violated there will inevitably be chaos and confusion (Eph. 5:22-25;
6:1-4).
- When God s plan is followed,
there will be peace and harmony.
- Biblical submission is very
difficult in some cases because oftentimes the husband is not saved, or is a
drunkard, abusive, etc.
- The Bible says if the
husband is not saved the Christian wife can win him to the Lord by her godly
testimony (I Peter 3:1-6; Titus 2:3-5).
- The worst thing a Christian
wife can do is start nagging because that will drive him further from the
Lord.
- The contentions of a wife
are a continual dropping (Pro. 19:13).
- It is better to dwell in a
corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house (Pro.
21:9).
- It is better to dwell in
the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman (Pro.
21:19).
- A continual dropping in a
very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike (Pro.
27:15).
- This reminds me of the poor
fellow who said, I take my wife
everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
- Contrast that
with Proverbs 18:22, Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good
thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
- A prudent wife is from the
LORD (Pro. 19:14).
- Who can find a virtuous
woman? for her price is far above rubies (Pro.
31:10).
- I realize that God s plan is
not popular today but we can plainly see that the world s way is not
working. I believe we ought to
stick with God s plan.
II.
HUSBANDS ARE TO BE LOVING
(EPH. 5:25).
- Here we see God s high
standard for love we are to love our wives even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave Himself for it (Eph. 5:25).
- By using the Christian home
as an illustration of our relationship with Christ, the apostle Paul has lifted
married love to the highest level possible (Eph.
5:23-33).
- Why does God have to tell us
to love our wives? Because we men
often take our wives for granted.
- Colossians 3:19 says:
Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
- Why does God tell us not to
be bitter against them (Col. 3:19)?
Because God knows this is often the case.
- So ought men to love their
wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh;
but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church (Eph. 5:28,
29).
- Therefore, when a husband
loves his wife, he is loving himself because husband and wife are one flesh
(Genesis 2:24).
- We ought to be grateful to
God for good Christian wives (cf. Pro. 31:10-12,
28-31).
III.
CHILDREN ARE TO BE OBEDIENT
(EPH. 6:1-3).
- For this is right (Eph.
6:1b).
- It is the first commandment
with promise (6:2).
- Honour thy father and thy
mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God
giveth thee. (Ex.
20:12).
- Obeying parents is well
pleasing unto the Lord (Col. 3:20).
- Obedience to our parents is
important, because parents stand in the place of God to
children.
- Parents spend many years
feeding their children, and clothing them, and educating them, and protecting
them, etc.
- Therefore, the Bible
(5th commandment) says, Honour thy father and thy mother (Ex.
20:12).
- In his commentary on the
book of Ephesians, WA Criswell tells a story about a beautiful restaurant in
Florida. Dr. Criswell referred to
it as one of the famous restaurants on the Eastern seaboard.
- A pastor friend took him
there one day, and as they walked past the cashier s desk they saw a huge
portrait of a pretty woman.
- The pastor explained the
story behind the picture. A father,
mother, and son worked a farm in south Georgia. The father died and the mother and son
relocated to Jacksonville, Florida where they opened up a small restaurant
downtown.
- They worked hard and the
Lord blessed them and the business flourished. They then moved to the outskirts
of town and built a beautiful, luxurious restaurant. Right before the work was completed the
mother passed away. Just before she
died, she said to her son, Son, I want you to promise me one thing. When this beautiful restaurant is
opened, will you promise me that you will never sell wine, or beer, or
liquor?
- The son promised his mother
he would not.
- When the beautiful
restaurant opened, salesmen and other representatives from the breweries, and
the wineries, and the liquor distilleries came by to do
business.
- They told the man, You
cannot run a luxurious restaurant like this unless you sell
alcohol.
- In each instance, the son
took the representatives to the lobby and pointed to the big picture of his
mother and said, I promised my mother before she died that I would never sell
alcoholic beverages in this beautiful place. Before I break that promise, I will go
back to the plow on the farm in Georgia.
- Honour thy father and thy
mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth
thee (Exodus 20:12).
- Honour thy father and
mother; which is the first commandment with promise (Eph. 6:2).
IV.
FATHERS ARE TO BE REASONABLE
(EPH. 6:4).
- We are to be reasonable with
our children. We should not
discourage them. Fathers,
provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged (Col.
3:21).
- Our # 1 job is to bring
them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Eph. 6:4). This means parents should educate
(especially about God) and discipline their
children.
- Nowhere in the Bible is the
training of children assigned to agencies outside the home (e.g.
schools).
CONCLUSION:
- Our families are under
attack by the devil. He is using
every weapon he can television, movies, the Internet, rock music, the public
schools, etc.
- We need to be very
careful. And we need to do things
God s way.
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